Monday, December 30, 2013

It's Not You, It's Me, Really.

A Skit to Consider:

The Stage is set. Picture a Cafe, tables and chairs spread comfortably, soft lighting, but not too dim . . .

A man sits alone at a table, obviously waiting for "that someone special." A waiter comes by, and the man indicates that he should bring "2" of something. The waiter leaves, looking back with a knowing gleam in his eye.
The man leans back in his chair and smiles the smile of the truly content.

And Enters his Lady.

She steps in, looks around expectantly, and her face takes on the same glowing smile that he has been wearing.

The Man stands as she approaches and pulls out her chair for her. He kisses her cheek as she sits, and he joins her. They begin to talk, and it is clear that they have some "catching up" to do, but shortly the conversation slows, and they drift into happy silence.

And now, we lean in closer to hear them better. For this is no chance encounter. And this is no common meeting.

The Lady looks at the man, down to her plate, and back up to him. It is clear that she has something she wants to ask him, but is working up to it.

At last she leans forward, grasping his hand in hers. He leans in as well, smiling in delight.

Her: There's something I've been wanting to ask you. . .

Him: Anything, just ask.

Her: But it's a bit silly.

Him: Go ahead. Anything.

Her: Do you promise not to laugh?

Him: From the bottom of my heart.

Her: Okay. (she reddens slightly, but presses on) You love me, don't you?

Him: (Smiling broadly)With all that I am.

Her: (relaxing, and reddening a bit more) Well, what I want to know is this: What is it about me that made you love me?
(The man shows some surprise at the question, not alarm, but perhaps a bit of amusement.)

Her: (hastening to explain) This isn't a trick question or anything like that. I really want to know.

Him: You really want to know?

Her: Yes.

Him: Okay. . . .  Nothing.

Her: (shock and a bit of confusion on her face)What?

Him: (smiling just as fondly) Nothing.

Her: (She smiles as if this is a joke, but his expression doesn't change. She is VERY confused) What do you mean "Nothing"? It can't be nothing. SOMEthing had to have made an impression.

Him: No. Not a thing.

Her: (no smile now) ok, you DID say that you LOVE me, right?

Him: Yes, definitely.

Her: Okaaaaay, so what was it?

Him: What do you mean?

Her: Well, (she glances around, embarrassed to have to say) was it my virtue, my personality, my appearance. . .

Him: Ah. No. None of that. You really don't have any qualities that stand out all that much.
(Her jaw drops. She pulls her hands out of his, hurt plain on her face)

Him: Oh! No, don't take it like that. I don't mean anything bad by that.

Her: How can you not?

Him: Well, let's be honest. (she makes a gesture that says "by all means, why stop now?") Okay, how about your appearance? (she leans back, arms crossed across her chest. her expression reads loud and clear "its your funeral, bub") You are pretty. No question, but you're not the prettiest person alive. There are thousands of people all over the world that are aesthetically more pleasing than you are. (He holds up a hand) that's not a criticism; it's just the plain truth. But really, would you want me to base my love for you on how pretty you are? That could change at any time. This way I can whole-heartedly say that I would love you just as much if you less pretty as I would if you were more. It has nothing to do with that.
(She still isn't happy, but she isn't getting up to leave. . . yet.)

Him: Alright, your personality. You're young. You're still learning new things about the world and yourself. You are still discovering things about who you are. You may find that something that had no interest for you last week is something you could devote your life to next week, or next year. Would you want me to base my love for you on something that could change? In order to keep my love, you'd feel confined not to grow as an individual.

Him: And let's not get started on your Virtue.
(Outraged, She begins to stand, but He reaches out and places a forestalling hand on Hers)
Be honest, would you want anyone to base their love for you on how perfect you truly are?
(She sits back down. Pauses for a moment, and slowly shakes her head "no".)

Her: (after a moment more) So if it's not any of that, why DO you love me?
(At this, His smile brightens again to the beaming glow He wore at the beginning of the conversation.)

Him: That's easy. I love you because of who I AM.

Her: Say what?

Him: Everything about you can change. Your appearance, your interests, your successes and failures--they can all change drastically from day to day. If I base my love for you on ANY of those things, then you run the risk of losing it at any time.

BUT, if I base my love for you on WHO I AM, then you can never do anything that will jeopardize that love.

Her: How is basing your love on YOU any different than basing it on me?

Him: Because I'll never change.

Her: How can you claim that?

*                                    *                                           *                                                         *

A Good question, Don't you think? 

Well, here is something that may put it into perspective: What if "He" is God, and "She" is you?

Just something to think about.


  1. This is very true in a Godly way and a human way. You can only truly be happy if you are happy with your self. God never changes which is great.

  2. What you posted is all so true in both a human and Godly way. God is the same which makes the our walk with God so perfect. In a human way if you don't love yourself you can't be truly happy.